Yes, the rumors are true. I'm friends with that guy.
All of us have friends that have left us speechless.
For some of you it’s because they do something incredible like volunteer with kids or provide the proper insight to guide you through a difficult situation.
In my case, it’s because one of my best friends does a lot of dumb stuff.
Last week we introduced the concept of Don’t Be That Guy (DBTG) but my friend, we’ll call him “Danny” really should change his name to DBTG.
There are plenty of instances where writing a story such as this is necessary, and this tale is absolutely impressive because he not only was way too drunk; he became a DBTG in front of a comedian.
What makes this story even more special is today’s DBTG also has a chance to explain himself, so a few of his quotes will be scattered throughout the story.
Let’s just get right into it.
One night a few friends and the DBTG went out to the Tampa Improv to see the very funny Bill Burr.
You may know him from his stand-up specials on both Comedy Central and HBO or even his various characters on Chappelle’s Show. Burr can be seen as one of the announcers for “The World Series of Dice” and the “Racial Draft” or my personal favorite, as one of the guys in the beer commercial “Dude’s Night Out.”
Anyway, following a great set, Burr makes the show even better by being one of the cool comedians and hangs out with the crowd near the bar for a few minutes after the show.
Burr is standing by himself at a round table with a few copies of his DVD for “Why Do I Do This” his Comedy Central special that came out earlier in 2009.
Great stand up performance, better reaction to DBTG.
Our group, which consists of Stephanie, Sarah, Franklin, DBTG and I, wait in line to get a picture and buy his DVD.
Let’s have DBTG take it away.
“For those that don’t know, the Improv forces you to drink. So given the current atmosphere of the situation, the charismatic person that I am, got into it and I’m feeling the vibes …
That night I was drinking Jack and Coke. Approximately 3 Jack and Cokes and 2 Coors Lights throughout the course of the show …
There’s the background of the story, we’ll get back to what the DBTG has to say, but to steer through the actual events of the night, we’re back into regular story mode.
Our friend Rey goes up first, he buys a DVD from Bill Burr, who gladly signs a copy and shakes his hand. Rey asks if the group can get a picture, I get the camera and take the picture.
“I don’t know what happens from there, but that’s when it went pretty crazy,” Rey said. “Everything was cool, but then “Danny” started to mess the whole night up.”
Really DBTG is not the one with the beer, it's someone else.
After this picture is taken, DBTG then asks Burr how much his DVD costs. “$20”Burr said. “It’s my new special, it’s really funny.”
DBTG then reaches in his pocket and pulls out his middle finger and flicks Burr off.
“Bill Burr is feeling it, I’m feeling Bill Burr,” DBTG said, followed by me laughing way too hard. “No, DO NOT PUT THAT IN THERE. I SWEAR TO GOD BRENDAN. NOT IN THE LITERAL SENSE …
I tell him how much I appreciated the show and then ask him how much are your DVDs? He told me $20. Me and Bill Burr are tight now, I reach in my pocket and pulled out my middle finger.”
Look at Bill Burr trying to cover his DVDs, that beer will soon be all over them.
Now, this really isn’t the end of the story. Just as a quick side note, it’s never a good idea to flick someone off, especially a stand-up comedian. Burr takes a few verbal jabs at “Danny”, causing me to laugh even more, then it’s redemption time for our friend DBTG.
DBTG explains that the finger was just a joke and that he really liked his show. Burr is cool about the whole situation and lets it roll off his back.
The next series of events is really what makes this night legendary.
After reconciling their differences, DBTG and Burr agree to take one more picture, but inexplicably, the middle finger comes out again, really confusing the comedian.
“I attempt to show him my good gesture, but in the mean time I spill over my Coors Light,” DBTG said. “The beer went all over his DVD collection and (on his pants). Bill looked at me like a deer in the headlights.”
So after flicking off Burr twice and ruining his DVD sales for the rest of the night, DBTG leaves the Improv and lands directly in the DBTG Hall of Fame.
Hopefully Burr can read this one day and know first hand of his encounter with Don’t Be That Guy, Celebrity Flicker Offer and Beer Spiller Guy.
