My Saturday mornings usually consist of McDonald’s breakfast and then fun-time at the neighborhood playground. I try to get into, but it’s mainly for my daughter. I usually end up feeling sick from the sausage sandwiches and always tell myself next weekend I won’t do it again. But my daughter is in love with the hot cakes and sausage meal. Beings she has me wrapped around her little finger, I always cave and take her to McDonald’s. She loves the playground. She loves it so much, there is usually always a “nuclear meltdown” when I tell her it’s time to leave. She actually got me up on the jungle gym today and pushed me down the slide, she’s getting pretty strong. But as my legs hung halfway down the entire length of the slide, I realized something, this was really lame. After my daughter pushed me, and within the 1.2 seconds it took my feet to hit the ground, I thought about why she was so excited. Then I remembered when I was a youngster. Going to the playground was the greatest thing ever. Now, well, it’s pretty freaking lame. So I’m on a journey to bring back the fun. Adult’s need a way to bring back that excitement. Here’s a list of things that used to be cool, and the things we could do now that would be even better.
1) Slide – The thrill of the slide comes from the sudden rush of falling down at greater-than-normal rates of speed. What else throws you down faster then normal? Roller coasters. Stop being a baby and just think of the roller coaster as a huge slide. A huge slide that keeps going and does loops and twists and hangs you upside-down until you lose your pocket change. How does this not look like fun?
2) Swings – I never got into swinging. But I did get into taking the swing as high as I could get it and jumping off at the peak of the swing. We would generate contests to see who could jump the farthest. So to match that thrill of jumping off the swing and soaring through the air, you must take a ride on The Blob. This is basically a huge under-inflated balloon that sits on water. One person sits on the far edge of The Blob, and another person, who begins on a platform 10-15 feet above the balloon, jumps down onto The Blob. The effect looks something like this.
EMBED-Most amazing blob jump launch – Watch more free videos
3) Zip-line – These were introduced into the playgrounds I grew up around only a few months prior to me being “too cool” to play on the kiddie toys, so in a way I feel like I got jipped. But these were the things that took the place for the lazy asses who turned their noses up at the monkey bars. All you had to do was hang on, and the let the mechanics do the rest. Well guess what, you still can be that lazy. But now it’s even better.
4) Teeter-totter – The irony about the teeter-totter is that it’s more fun when you have more weight to throw around on it. Therefore, I think it’s a better experience when you are older. However, other parents think it’s kind of inappropriate for an adult to stare down their child until they get off the seat. So, instead, try your luck out on the mechanical bull. She did.
So what you say people? Let’s get back to the more exciting times. If you have any pictures, or videos, of you and your friends showing what it means to be young at heart, please send them into ManWhole.com. P.O. Box 345, San Fernando Valley, New Mexico… (we really don’t really have an address, just click here.)
